NOBODY

A wordpress.com site that shows the interesting life of a no person

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Tag: Self-worth

  • Day 21:Things seem to be getting better?

    kauff kaufffffff kkkkkkafffffu! (coughing)

    Dummy’s challenge

    Latest Life Update:

    Received another phone call for interview from another company.

    I may need to see the doctor tomorrow. I am still coughing a lot.

    Although I am recovering, I still have to see my therapist. Realizing it may be a good opportunity to record some video clips and photos, I brought my camera with me.

    During my session, my therapist observed that my body posture became less grounded after reuniting with my family again. I told her that I had to shut down my senses to be sane in the household.

    My therapist told me that I have to move out as soon as possible. Both of us are very clear of the consequences if I go on living with my family. At last, she reminded me to create the calmly, worry-free mode I had in my mind.

    Just like the life in Laos🇱🇦.

    These are the photos I took before and after seeing my therapists. I don’t know why some photos look unclear 😭.

    This time, I experimented with a new angle – from bottom to top.
    The front face of the mini-bus.
    From the second floor.

    When I was heading towards the train station, I entered a garden and saw a middle-age man holding a camera. We were observing the old men who were playing Chinese Chess(XiangQi) against each other.

    The man told me he was from Belgium. He visited Sri Lanka and went to Hong Kong due to a flight delay. I was shocked when I heard him said,

    “Hong Kong is a place with amazing views. You see the street view!“

    The crowded commercial buildings? Or the clement forest? Undeniably, he was right. But it is not the full picture. When you have been facing the tall, lifeless buildings everyday, you won’t find them very pretty at all 😅.

    Not sure about which one is better.
    The tree in the corner of the city
    (Sighed)

    From these photos, you can see that I tried very hard to capture the view from the “bottom” angle. Some worked out, and most failed. It’s very difficult to get the full frame of the buildings. I think the causes are my techniques + equipments’ limitations.

    The most successful(?) attempt?
    ?????
    🤦‍♀️…
    The beam of life
    Try my best to find the best angle.
    Not the best, but not the worst.
    There are many beautiful paintings on the street.

    I then headed to a place to collect the tennis ball I left last Saturday. The host of the sharing session talked to me. She was very friendly and offered many tips on applying jobs for NGOs in Hong Kong. I am glad that I am able to meet people like her in my life. Her genuine sharing made me realize that I am not lagging behind.

    Free free to drop your comments or share your thoughts in the comment section. Looking forward to your feedback. 😃

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  • Day 5: Overcoming External Opinions

    Live for yourself, not others

    The souvenir from my relative who returned from the UK

    Just a short update on Day 5.

    Today’s event

    I met my relatives and had lunch with them. Unsurprisingly, the age gap between us made me found the conversation very boring and lifeless. All they talked about was body check and diet advice.

    However, a moment also made me realize that I am not confident enough.

    When one of them asked if I would get a master’s degree, I said no. He then lower his voice and said,

    ” You are not good at studying, so it is of no use to pursue a master’s degree.”

    His words sounded unpleasant in my ears. I knew it was because I had grown up in a very toxic family environment that never allowed me to focus on my studies.

    My family members struggle with severe mental illness. They often couldn’t control their temper and fought constantly. Their toxic behavior suffocated me emotionally, leaving me drained and unable to concentrate.

    (Since I was living in a chaotic household, I would say that if I care about my health and well-being, I can guarantee that I wouldn’t be able to get my degree.)

    Despite that, I didn’t fight back or tried to convince him. I understood that it was meaningless to explain to others the difficulties you are facing in life.

    I felt like other people didn’t understand my situation, but sometimes you can’t expect everyone will know your backstory. This is a topic I have to work on –

    How not to be affected by other people.

    I believe that one day I can tackle this issue and live freely.

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